We support traditional principles that respect and uphold the vital roles that
THE FAMILY plays in society.

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strengthining families

STAND FOR THE FAMILY

By on Nov 13 in Blog tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off

STAND FOR THE FAMILY

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the family
the family

Vera & Tom DavisMy Grandfather Thomas M. Davis and grandmother Vera Ann Davis were educators.  Grandpa once told me,

“If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything!”

As a young boy, my Father would tell us about the “Good Old Days” . . . you know, when he was taught respect, manners, being courteous, and the way to treat a woman.  He shared how he was brought up with a strong religious faith and that Sundays were holy, and prayer was used throughout the week.  His Father died when he was 6 weeks old when he got kicked by a horse.  He shared how hard that was and how he had to stand up and fight for what he believed in and for what he wanted.  He also taught us that the best way to get ahead in life was . . . to go to work!

Well, guess what I did when I was young?    You’re right . . . I worked!

My parents raised eight boys and one girl (that’s Marie) in a small town of Ogden, Utah and we all worked hard.  We had fun but, when school was over, so were friends.  It was time for family. We milked cows, raised gardens, bailed hay, hauled irrigation pipe and hoed sugar beets, … we always had a school room in our home where Mother would teach us and our two deaf brothers.  That’s where we also learned to love music, to play instruments and to sing! Tom and Virl

the familyMy father had been an army sergeant, and when it came to raising eight sons, some people used to accuse him of having too much “Regimentation!”  He would simply smile and say, “I like to call it, Organization!”  Yes, we were disciplined but mainly taught self-discipline in order to become better people, better at our music, to achieve our goals and meet our opportunities.  I truly think that this is what’s missing today in many families and homes.  Self discipline and order!

In today world, we try to fit more into less… and do less, to get more.  We keep trying to find shortcuts in time and travel, with fast foods, quick start programs and overnight education. We use treadmills instead of going hiking, we make apps to do things quicker and use caffeine to stay awake longer. We don’t cook, but eat out!  Kids go to daycare and in business we cut corners and charge more.  We have sex before marriage, if we marry at all!  If pregnant we just abort, get divorced if we want a change, and tell lies, then just pay the fine.  We cheat and say I don’t remember, steal and say it’s entitlement, give our kids a pat on the back and call it spending time and say “ask your Mom” in order to solve the problems!

Is this how we are living today?  Is this how we are raising our families?

Then it’s time to take a STAND!

the familySuzanne and I aren’t perfect, but especially since we had eight sons of our own and now 24 grandchildren,  we created TheFamily.com website and the One Heart Foundation for “Strengthening The Family.”  We publish various ways to help The Family Physically, Mentally, Socially, Spiritually, and Financially.  We reach out to help sick children, deaf children, homeless families and those in need.  We stand up against Pornography and Drug abuse and stand for Marriage.  We stand for values, morals, and family traditions, and for the Proclamation on The Family . . . recognizing that we are all children of God.

It seems that most of the problems today are because of:

 “The Breakdown of The Family”!

In the Past . . .

  • Most children lived in a home with both their mother and father, who were married.

  • Life in the womb was valued and considered sacred.

  • The rights of parents were Respected.

  • Religious freedom was Protected and Practiced.

  • We put our trust in God.

How did we let things slip so far?

Life is based upon eternal laws and truths and if you break them, someone usually gets hurt.  As we try to make a change for the better, let us remember that there are some things that cannot be changed.  We cannot change the laws of God.  That’s where life comes in!  the family

We must also NEVER Get discouraged!

the familyWhen we were kids, an uncle said to my Father, “Why do you want your boys in show business with all those wicked women?” “I know your boys can sing but, they’re not that good.”

After we were on TV with The Andy Williams Shows we wanted to record music that we and our teen age friends and peers liked, and a record producer told us . . . “You’ll never make it in show business because you are too clean cut!   Too “Goody-Goody”  But we did!  We just let those words go in one ear and out the other.

We also made some CAREER decisions that some thought were a bit odd, but we always tried to keep our family values first and worked hard at staying together.

One day when we were looking for that next hit record, we got a call from our record President saying they found a hit record for us and for us to go and meet the writer at the recording studio.  So we did!

There was this really a nice black guy with a song he wrote that was incredible, but . . . there were some lyrics in it that we just couldn’t sing.  Our record president said if you don’t record it, we’ll lose a hit record!  My mother then said, let me go and talk to him.   After she explained that we just couldn’t sing those lyrics, the writer said to my mother,  “If my Mama were here today, she would slap my face!  Now let’s go and change those lyrics!”  He did!  We recorded it, … and it was a hit record, “Love Me For A Reason”! Love Me For A Reason

I was an Executive Producer for the Donny & Marie  Shows in Los Angeles and when ABC President, Fred Silverman, renewed another year for our weekly TV series, I was the one that had to tell him that we would love to renew but that we wanted to move the TV Series to Utah.  Fred said, “What’s in Utah?”

the familyYou’re right!  We build the Osmond Studios in Orem so we could be with all of our family and do it from home.

We all eventually sold our nice homes and everyone moved to Osmond Family TheaterBranson, Missouri.  Some people thought we had received a call from the Prophet of our Church to “go to Missouri”.  We would smile and jokingly say, “Didn’t you get your letter?” mission call

Yes, we all worked together at our new Osmond Family Theater so we could be together and not have to travel so much.  Our audiences would do the traveling to see us!

the familyMore hit records and traveling started to come and yes, we were missing our wives and families once again.  We said to each other, “Is this where our Gold Records got us?  So, we quit performing and went home.  We didn’t know what we would do to make a living but we said we would do anything to be home, be good  husbands and fathers.

the familyThat’s when I created ‘Stadium of Fire’ so I could be with my family and work from home.

So you see, “We must NOT fear the future but deal with it!

It takes – Self Discipline!

How do we counter act the forces of the world that pulls family apart?

We maintain Family Traditions.  Here are a few of ours:

Al&SuzOboysGen7270_28 MED

  • Birthdays are each celebrated with a special birthday plate and a personalized cake.  Mother would cook their favorite foods.

  • For Thanksgiving, we cooked the turkey and our kids each bring a side dish.

  • Christmas Eve – We have Banana Splits.  We read the Christmas Story and the children re-enact it.  We open new pajamas & presents from Grandma & Grandpa, then they go to their homes before ‘Santa’ comes!

  • Waffles w/strawberries precedes General Conference.

  • Eleven Eleven is Suzanne’s families’ Pinegar Day, and there is no working on Sundays and family nights.

  • We dedicated the cabin in which our Mother Olive May Davis was born.  It’s where her parents lived for years.  It became a museum in Samaria/Malad, Idaho.  A friend Luke Waldron rebuilt and he and the City of Malad maintain it for scheduled tours.

  • Family Reunions happen with Pictures, Journals, Family History and a serious group photo plus always one funny one!the familythe familythe familythe family

The Family - "The Way" to Eternal Life.

“We seek higher things.”

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You see, these studies were recently published in New York Times stating that: The ones who know a lot about their families, tend to do better when they face challenges. For example:
  1. Do you know where your grandparents grew up?the family the family

  2. Do you know where your mom and dad went to high school?

  3. Do you know where your parents met?

  4. How about an illness or something really terrible that happened in your family and how they overcame it?

  5. Do you know the story of your birth?

the family(This is the original cabin where my Davis Grandparents lived and where my Mother, Olive May Davis was born in Samaria, Idaho.the family
It was rebuilt and maintained by Luke Waldron and dedicated as a museum in tribute to Olive by The Osmond and Davis Families, Luke Waldron and friends of Samaria.)the family

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It’s now proven that:

The more children know about their family’s history, the stronger their sense of control they have over their lives.

The higher their self-esteem, the more succcessful their families functioned.

It’s all about a child’s sense of being part of a larger family.  the family

So if we want a happier family, we must create, refine and retell the story of your family’s positive moments and your ability to bounce back from the difficult ones.

That act alone may increase the odds that your family will thrive for many generations to come.

NOW – IS THE TIME to STAND FOR THE FAMILY!

(Portions of this talk will be given at the event, “Stand For The Family Conference”.)

Al&Suz2013

Alan Osmond
For The Family

It’s Gotta Be The Last Days

By on Feb 12 in Blog tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off

It’s Gotta Be The Last Days

the family

“We have come to the earth in troubled times. The moral compass of the masses has gradually shifted to an “almost anything goes” position.

I’ve lived long enough to have witnessed much of the metamorphosis of society’s morals. Where once the standards of your religion and beliefs, and the standards of society were mostly compatible, now there is a wide chasm between us, and it’s growing ever wider.

the familyMany movies and television shows portray behavior which is in direct opposition to the laws of God. Do not subject yourself to the innuendo and outright filth which are so often found there. The lyrics in much of today’s music fall in the same category. The profanity so prevalent around us today would never have been tolerated in the not-too-distant past.the family Sadly, the Lord’s name is taken in vain over and over again. Recall with me the commandment—one of the ten—which the Lord revealed to Moses on Mount Sinai: “Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain; for the Lord will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain.” I am sorry that any of us is subjected to profane language, and I plead with you not to use it. I implore you not to say or to do anything of which you cannot be proud.

Stay completely away from pornography. Do not allow yourself to view it, ever. It has proven to be an addiction which is more than difficult to overcome. Avoid alcohol and tobacco or any other drugs, also addictions which you would be hard pressed to conquer.

What will protect you from the sin and evil around you?

I maintain that a strong testimony of our Savior and of His gospel will help see you through to safety.”  Thomas S. Monsonthe family

“It’s Gotta Be The Last Days”

LISTEN: The Last Days

“It’s Gotta Be The Last Days”

“Nations take up their battle stations.
Patrons of zodiac revelations.
Lustations breaking family relations.
Litigation allowing shoot-up sensations.
That’s what they said
Some day it woiuld be.
Now just look around,
if that’s what we see…
It’s gotta be the Last Days.
Gotta be the Last Days.

People living lives of confusion.
Millions caught up in revolution.
Cities  lost in their own pollution.
Question, what is the constitution?
That’s what they said
Some day it woiuld be.
Now just look around,
if that’s what we see…
It’s gotta be the Last Days.
Gotta be the Last Days.”

Written and Sung by: The Osmonds
© 1972

The Plan Album

Scriptural Warnings:

“For their laws and their governments were established by the voice of the people, and they who chose evil were more numerous than they who chose good, therefore they were ripening with destruction, for the laws had become corrupted.” Helaman 5:2

“This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affection, truce breakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God”.  2 Timothy 3:1-4

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“I know of nothing in the history… of the world to compare with our present circumstances. Nothing happened in Sodom and Gomorrah which exceeds in wickedness and depravity that which surrounds us now. Words of profanity, vulgarity, and blasphemy are heard everywhere. Unspeakable wickedness and perversion were once hidden in dark places; now they are in the open, and even accorded legal protection. At Sodom and Gomorrah these things were localized. Now, they are spread across the world, and they are among us”.

Boyd K. Packer
President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles

For The Family

Is America Worth Saving?

By on Aug 07 in Blog tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Is America Worth Saving?

the family

Is America worth trying to save? Save from what you might ask. Is America worth saving from self-destruction? Maybe that’s a better question to ask.

the familyCivilizations have risen and fallen through the ages. Countries have been birthed and countries have died. I believe the United States of America was birthed by the God of the Bible primarily for the purpose of advancing the gospel of Jesus Christ both here and around the world unlike any other country in history.

Even before we won our independence from England, the Christian faith had begun to spread like wildfire across the land. My dad, a Methodist minister, used to tell me stories about the legendary circuit riders who later traveled on horseback to evangelize the new nation. These men would brave whatever was in front of them to carry the message of Jesus Christ throughout the New World. Other denominations trail blazed the gospel as well and soon our country became recognized both here and abroad as a distinctively Christian nation. the familyThe evidence was so overwhelming that in 1892 the Supreme Court wrote in the case Church of the Holy Trinity v The United States: “These, and many other matters which might be noticed, add a volume of unofficial declarations to the mass of organic utterances that this is a Christian nation.”

Our country has known freedom for the individual unlike any other country in history. Quite frankly, the idea was novel that people could govern themselves. In order for freedom to be sustained the masses had to be willing to act morally and lawfully by their own volition or else society would crumble from within. Thus wrote our second president John Adams: “Our Constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other.” The Ten Commandments and the Sermon on the Mount were how we judged good and evil, right and wrong. Some of that still remains, but respect for those teachings and reverence for the God who spoke them is deteriorating at a very rapid rate.

In modern day America, there is very little shame anymore. Most Americans have lost their fear of God. We are on the road to self-destruction.

Secularists mock the idea of God. Judges forbid even the acknowledgement of God in many public places. We teach our children they come from monkeys. Those who hold to the biblical definition of marriage are called hatemongers. the familyThe entertainment industry promotes sex without moral standards day after day, movie after movie, song after song – influencing our youth beyond measure. Try to raise any objection to this tide of immorality and you are quickly shouted down, ridiculed, called a prude, a hater, a religious nut, a censor or a fundamentalist.

What we are experiencing today in America is unbridled selfishness and licentiousness and the results are manifesting themselves in many terrible ways that will only get worse if things don’t change.

For the Christian in America today there is only so much we can do. Only 43% of our fellow countrymen even go to church today. We are now outnumbered. But that which we can do, with God’s help, we must do. We can pray to God that He send revival to America. We can continue to build strong Christian families. We can put our denominational barriers aside when there are shared values we can defend concerning issues that affect the moral health of our nation. We can share our faith. We can continue to hold high the standard of righteousness and we can vote for candidates who best reflect our values. There are no perfect candidates, but we are a nation of laws so we must elect the best available lawmakers to govern us and hold them accountable.

So to answer my own question, yes, America is worth trying to save. For our children, grandchildren and generations to come. We cannot give up. There is nowhere else to start over. There is nowhere else to where we can sail!

Sincerely,

Tim

Tim Wildmon, President
American Family Association

For The Family

Love, Marriage, Sex: Still The Best Order Of Events

By on Sep 14 in Blog tagged , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

the familyTrying out a potential marriage partner like you might try out a car before buying it is NOT a good idea or a prudent decision.

The “prevailing wisdom” in the world today is that it is a bit foolish and impulsive to just marry someone you have never lived with, hoping you will be compatible.

Why not cohabitate for a while and test each other out before tying the knot?

While there are still couples who wait for a deep level of commitment before having sex, today it’s far more common for two people to explore their sexual compatibility before making long-term plans together.

So which approach or method leads to better marriages?

Sex and cohabitation before marriage or delaying them both until after marriage?

A new study in the American Psychological Association’s Journal of Family Psychology sides with a delayed approach.

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The study involves 2,035 married individuals who participated in a popular online marital assessment called “RELATE.”

From the assessment’s database, researchers selected a sample designed to match the demographics of the married American population.

The extensive questionnaire includes the question “When did you become sexual in this relationship?”

A statistical analysis showed the following benefits enjoyed by couples who waited until marriage compared to those who started having sex in the early part of their relationship:

Relationship stability was rated 22 percent higher

Relationship satisfaction was rated 20 percent higher

Sexual quality of the relationship was rated 15 percent better

Communication was rated 12 percent better

For couples in between — those that became sexually involved later in the relationship but prior to marriage — the benefits were about half as strong.

In other words, to put it bluntly, the longer you wait, the longer your marriage will last, and the better it will be.

the family“There’s more to a relationship than sex, but we did find that those who waited longer were happier with the sexual aspect of their relationship,” said lead author Dean Busby, a professor at BYU in the School of Family Life.

“I think it’s because they’ve learned to talk and have the skills to work with issues that come up.”

Sociologist Mark Regnerus of the University of Texas at Austin, who was not involved with this research, read the study and shared his take on the findings.

“Couples who hit the honeymoon too early — that is, prioritize sex promptly at the outset of a relationship — often find their relationships underdeveloped when it comes to the qualities that make relationships stable and spouses reliable and trustworthy,” said Regnerus, author of “Premarital Sex in America,” a book from Oxford University Press.

  1. So … the simple fact is that what we see in today’s movies, romantic comedies and TV sitcoms — where everyone goes home to bed on their first date — is WRONG on at least three levels.For most of us, it is morally wrong.

  2. It is practically wrong because, as statistics show, marriage works better when sex is delayed.
  3. It is factually wrong in that it doesn’t really happen that way as often as the media suggests.

As parents, we ought to be teaching all three of the “wrongs” to our children. The wonderful thing we call “chastity” is not only about morality, it is about practicality, too.

And just because they see “just acquainted” people sleeping together in movies doesn’t mean that that’s the way it usually happens.

For further help on positive ways to talk to kids about sex, go to www.valuesparenting.com and click on “how to talk to your child about sex” on the left menu.

“In the celestial glory there are three heavens or degrees;  And in order to obtain the highest, a man must enter into this order of the priesthood [meaning the new and everlasting covenant of marriage];  And if he does not, he cannot obtain it.  He may enter into the other, but that is the end of his kingdom; he cannot have an increase.” D&C 131: 1-4

Richard & Linda Eyre
For The Family

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NOTE: The Eyres’ new book is “The Entitlement Trap: How to rescue your child with a new family system of choosing, earning, and ownership” (see www.EntitlementTrap.com). Richard and Linda are New York Times No. 1 best-selling authors who lecture throughout the world on family-related topics. Visit the Eyres anytime at www.TheEyres.com. “The Entitlement Trap” can now be preordered. See details atwww.valuesparenting.com.

 

Have Your Drivers License Taken Away, Forever?

By on Mar 28 in Blog tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Why do you think we call our God, “The CREATOR’?

Because he creates life and worlds without number.  This is His Work and His Glory. . . in being A CREATOR.

If God is a Heavenly Father, then who are we?

We are His Children!  You and Me!

As God’s children, we have come to earth and have been given a physical body just like our Heavenly Parents, with “sacred powers” to ‘TEST DRIVE’, to get MARRIED, which is ordained of God, and to fulfill God’s commandment to “multiply and replenish the earth” and to be a CREATOR of life also, while here on earth.  Our Father in Heaven wants what all fathers desire, and that is for their children to have all of the same experiences and joys in becoming parents like them.  Our physical body is just like our Heavenly Parent’s except that their bodies are glorified and eternal, as we may become.  Yes, we all will die and this power will be taken from us.

In order to be proven in all things amd become like Him, our Heavenly Father gave us commandments and laws to obey.  We agreed to follow His word before we even came here. We are NOW here and we are somewhat like going to school, to learn and to be judged.  And what do they give you in school?  That’s right, TESTS!

Yes, we are here to be tested, to see who of all God’s children will learn and obey His commandments and to see if we can pass lifes TESTS and be worthy to continue to have these creative powers again or NOT, if we misuse them.  If we do, just like a policeman who pulls you over for breaking traffic laws, you could have your “creator drivers license” taken away because of wreckless driving.  If you commit wreckless sexual sins, you too, will also be pulled over and may not be privileged to become more like your eternal parents and have eternal increase in the worlds to come, for ‘God is not the author of confusion’.

This world has many choices.  They are either good or evil – Eternal life or everlasting darkness.  Too many follow ‘the natural man’ which is an enemy to God.

“For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.” Mosiah 3: 19

The use of these creative sexual powers is one of  the main reasons we came to this world so that we can become more like our parents, as all children do.   It is to see whom among us can keep those sacred powers sacred and NOT misuse them! It’s just like getting a drivers license to drive a car.  Once you get it, if you are not careful, it can be taken away!   These “creative powers” are what makes us Creators like our Father and Mother in Heaven.

Again, may we please understand that WE MUST NOT follow the “Natural Man” or the “Natural Woman”.

Some may laugh or think otherwise but as Jesus said, ‘Father, forgive them for they know not what the do.’  Unfortunately many do know but don’t care! These precious children of God that we are allowed to bring down from heaven and into this world are our responsibility and they deserve a lawfully and leagally wedded Mother and a Father who will provide a safe and loving home for them until we all return back home to the highest mansion or heaven, which is the only heaven that these powers will be available to us and only to those that are worthy to continue on with eternal increase! The heavens are governed by God’s laws.

Make sure that you are NOT stopped or “damned” with your eternal progression!

YES, It’s that serious!

So is Jesus Christ.

“For behold, this is my church; whosoever is baptized shall be baptized unto repentance. And whomsoever ye receive shall believe in my name; and him will I freely forgive.

Therefore I say unto you, Go; and whosoever transgresseth against me, him shall ye judge according to the sins which he has committed; and if he confess his sins before thee and me, and repenteth in the sincerity of his heart, him shall ye forgive, and I will forgive him also.

Yea, and as often as my people repent will I forgive them their trespasses against me.

And ye shall also forgive one another your trespasses; for verily I say unto you, he that forgiveth not his neighbor’s trespasses when he says that he repents, the same hath brought himself under condemnation.” Mosiah 26: 22, 29-31

Like my Mother Olive often said, I am not trying to convert you or discredit the truths you already have in your various religions . . . but to share further “LIGHT and KNOWLEDGE” about “THE WAY” … to get back to Heaven.  Truth is Light!  The Glory of God is Intelligence.  The more we attain in this world, it will rise with us in the resurrection which is guaranteed to all by the sacrifice of Jesus!  “There is a Glory like unto the STARS, a Glory like unto the MOON, and a Glory like unto the SUN!  So also is the Resurrection”!

We each will Choose our Glory by which higher laws we are willing to live.  “You’ve Got The Power To Choose”!


Learn More?

Click To Listen: 04-Movie-Man

Alan Osmond
For The Familiy

Sexual Abstinence Until Marriage Leads To Stability And Trust.

By on Feb 10 in Blog tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

A new BYU study, published in the American Psychological Association’s Journal of Family Psychology, shows that those ideas are not supported by research — and that includes people of all ages, races and religious backgrounds.

“So many people think that sexual compatibility must be one of the first things figured out,” said Dean Busby, BYU professor and lead author on the study. “However, we didn’t find any benefit to early sexual involvement.”

In fact, researchers came to find that sexual timing in relationships has a large effect on the quality of relationships and overall satisfaction. They concluded that individuals who waited until marriage to have sex experienced more satisfaction, stability and better communication in relationships.

For members of the Church, the concept of waiting to have sex until marriage isn’t new — the commandment is an eternal principle encouraged from a young age and emphasized in the youth programs of the Church and the For the Strength of Youth pamphlet.

The newly published research shows some of the other benefits — more than the spiritual — that come from abstinence until marriage.

“The research supports it from a different angle,” Brother Busby said. “That was part of our hope … makes people think maybe there is more to this commandment to be with one person. It builds relationships in very important ways and helps people make better decisions in who to marry.”

Research shows that as couples develop their relationship while delaying or refraining from sexual intimacy they are able to form foundations on communication and other social processes.

“When couples become sexual early in the relationship … other areas do not develop as well,” Brother Busby said. “Couples who wait spend time talking and sharing their life, getting to know each other in other ways, strengthening their relations and creating greater relationship satisfaction.”

Brother Busby, along with his BYU associates Jason Carroll and Brian Willoughby, started studying sexual timing at the end of 2007. More than 2,000 married individuals answered questions while participating in an online marital assessment called “RELATE” — a study that has been collecting data and conducting research on different aspects of relationships and marriage for more than 30 years.

The average age of participants was 36, but the sample ages ranged from as young as 18 and as old as 70. Although the recent study came out of BYU, a known religious institution, researchers were sure to take religiosity into account, controlling the study to represent more of the demographics of the married American population, including participants of all ages, races and religious affiliation in the study. Only six percent of the study included members of the Church.

Along with questions about communication and overall satisfaction in relationships, participants answered the question, “When did you become sexual in this relationship?”

Researchers found that for those who waited to have sex until they were married rated their relationship stability 22 percent higher, their relationship satisfaction 20 percent higher, sexual quality of the relationship 15 percent better and communication 12 percent better, than those who did not wait for marriage. Results from the study show that couples who were in between — meaning those who became sexually involved later in the relationship but prior to marriage — had half of the reported benefits.

“When couples are sexual very early it sets up seeds of distrust,” Brother Busby said. “Knowing that the person was sexual with [an individual] before they really knew [that person] without a commitment and trust lingers in a relationship.”

That, Brother Busby said, leads to less stability and trust.

“In the end, sex in a relationship is relative,” Brother Busby said. “If you think of the amount of time in relationships, it is relatively small. Time talking and developing relationships is greater and are so crucial in how you are going to feel in the companionship. Today, things are turned upside down. It is all about sex first and then couples hope the other areas develop.”

Although the physical element in a relationship is still very important, Brother Busby said, it is the timing that is the crucial part.

In the end, research proves that following the standards set forth in the gospel contributes to stronger relationships and greater satisfaction.

“The longer a couple waits, the better,” Brother Busby said.

mholman@desnews.com

Are You Being Chased OR Are You Being Chaste?

By on Feb 03 in Blog tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

OR

.

.Either way, as a person… you are being sought after!

We believe in being honest, true, chastebenevolent, virtuous, and in doing good to all men; indeed, we may say that we follow the admonition of Paul—We believe all thingswe hope all thingswe have endured many things, and hope to be able to endure all things. If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.

Are you “In the world but NOT OF the world”.  OR  Are you “IN and OF the world.”
That is your choice!

Those who are chaste are morally clean in their thoughts, words, and actions. Chastity means not having any sexual relations before marriage. It also means complete fidelity to husband or wife during marriage.  Chastity is sexual purity.

In the world today, Satan has led many people to believe that sexual intimacy outside of marriage is acceptable. But in God’s sight, it is a serious sin. It is an abuse of the power He has given us to create life. The prophet Alma taught that sexual sins are more serious than any other sins except murder and denying the Holy Ghost (Alma 39: 3-5).

Sometimes people try to convince themselves that sexual relations outside of marriage are acceptable if the participants love one another. This is not true. Breaking the law of chastity and encouraging someone else to do so is not an expression of love. People who love each other will never endanger one another’s happiness and safety in exchange for temporary personal pleasure.

When people care for one another enough to keep the law of chastity, their love, trust, and commitment increase, resulting in greater happiness and unity. In contrast, relationships built on sexual immorality sour quickly. Those who engage in sexual immorality often feel fear, guilt, and shame. Bitterness, jealousy, and hatred soon replace any positive feelings that once existed in their relationship.

In this life, we are given the power to choose The Way that we wish to live our lives and in whom we wish to follow.

Scriptures teach us that there are two ways you can choose.  “Therefore, cheer up your hearts, and remember that ye are free to act for yourselves—to choose the way of everlasting death or the way of eternal life.  2 Ne. 10: 23

“Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.  What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own.  For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.”  1 Corinthians 6:18-20

“Use boldness, but not overbearance; and also see that ye bridle all your passions, that ye may be filled with love; see that ye refrain from idleness.  Alma 38:12

“Behold, it is written by them of old time, that thou shalt not commit adultery;  But I say unto you, that whosoever looketh on a woman, to lust after her, hath committed adultery already in his heart.  Behold, I give unto you a commandment, that ye suffer none of these things to enter into your heart;  For it is better that ye should deny yourselves of these things, wherein ye will take up your cross, than that ye should be cast into hell.”  3 Nephi 12:27-30

Strong words, but with very little confusion as to what we are to do and not to do!

It is important for you to date and find that special someone that you trust with all your heart who will marry you and take care of you in sickness and health and also forever!  The only way to be married forever is to do it in The House of The Lord.  These are Holy Temples, where a couple can be married not only for time, but also for all eternity.  Plus, by keeping God’s commandment to ‘multiply and replenish the earth’, those children that you bear will all be sealed to you as husband and wife.  This is ‘The Way’ that lasts forever and the only way for you to become like your Heavenly Parents and live forever with eternal offspring.  Otherwise, it is sin, and you will be judged for your evil works.

If you have make some mistakes already in your life and wish to get rid of those sins, then Jesus is the ‘Only Way’ to be forgiven.  He died for us knowing that we would make mistakes and need forgiveness. Let Him be your Savior and accept His sacrifice. Don’t let His offer be wasted in your behalf.  Accept Him with Faith and Repentance and be Baptized to wash away those sins and receive the Gift of the Holy Ghost to help lead you through this trying world, especially in these last days, that you might have ‘clean hands and a pure heart’ to receive Jesus Christ as He is coming back again!

Parents, one look at the world today is enough to provide convincing evidence that we must give high priority to teaching our children moral purity. In the past, we could count on society to give us a helping hand, but no more. In fact, society—as an examination of some of the media could lead us to believe—has, in general, defected to the enemy, hailing immorality as an acceptable and inviting life-style.

Beyond that facade, however, there are millions of parents trying to combat the evil around us. Certainly we in the Church should understand the responsibility parents have to resist immorality and to teach the wrongness of it.

Teach with openness and warmth. We need to be the first to teach our sons and daughters the basics about sexuality, for the first information can have the greatest impact. Carefully and prayerfully, we must plan how we will teach them the basic sexual functions of their bodies, recognizing that this instruction is not just a one-time event.  The need for more information grows as the child grows. We must be there to answer questions, unembarrassed and spiritually guided. Children need to know that their bodies are sacred, created by a loving Heavenly Father, and that it is their divine responsibility to protect and never defile their procreative functions.

Teach the doctrine of the Church regarding morality. Our Church leaders have provided us with a clear definition of what the Lord expects of us regarding sexual purity. “The Lord specifically forbids certain behaviors, including all sexual relations before marriage, petting, sex perversion (such as homosexuality, rape, and incest), masturbation, or preoccupation with sex in thought, speech, or action.”  We must be sure our children understand the meaning of these words in the context of the gospel; if not, someone else, without the Spirit, may lead them into unrighteousness.

“In the category of crimes, only murder and denying the Holy Ghost come ahead of illicit sexual relations, which we call fornication when it involves an unmarried person, or the graver sin of adultery when it involves one who is married. … In the eyes of God, chastity will never be out of date.”

Our children need to have a clear understanding that “it is not pleasing to the Lord to sow one’s wild oats, to engage in sexual transgression of any nature, and then expect that planned confession and quick repentance will satisfy the Lord.”  Ezra Taft Benson

Teach children how to make wise choices. They need to understand that their sexual feelings are natural and God-given, and that they do have the power to control them. We must help them comprehend the blessing of their great gift of agency. “Therefore, cheer up your hearts, and remember that ye are free to act for yourselves—to choose the way of everlasting death or the way of eternal life.” (2 Ne. 10:23.)

Who would choose everlasting death over eternal life? Perhaps only those who are not experienced in the art of choosing. According to a bishop in Texas, “many parents aren’t allowing their children to make even simple decisions on their own. How can they make choices with eternal consequences if they aren’t allowed to choose their own clothes, hairstyles, hobbies, etc.?” Parents need to guide youth in making some choices more than others. But children can learn to choose appropriate friends, music, movies, and other activities if we lovingly help them consider the effects these choices can have on their morality.

Help build strong testimonies of the gospel. Over and over, young men and women have told me that the single most important factor in their choosing sexual purity was their testimony of Jesus Christ.

Create a happy environment at home. We need to enjoy life around home. One father of teenagers said, “Having fun with our children has been a key to helping them choose morality. My wife and I emphasize that it’s fun to be good.” Then they try to prove it. “We work at having fun, and it’s paying off.”

Alan Osmond,
Joy Lundberg
For The Family

Like Father Like Sons. The Osmonds Second Generation.

By on Jan 22 in Blog, Videos tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tSUlvZfBTs4[/youtube]

What a responsibility it is to be a father of eights sons and growing up especially during these troubled times with  them possibly wanting to pattern their lives and careers after my own, in show business.  Such was the case of my sons, The Osmonds Second Generation.

Yes, we love music and our home was filled with it.  Our boys actually stated singing on their own.  Suzanne and I discovered one night after returning home from a night out together and found our sons watching old videos of me and my brothers singing barbershop harmony.  The funny thing was they were singing right along with the video and singing in two part harmony as well!  We both looked at each other and said, oh, oh!

The next day I sat my sons down and taught them a song in two part harmony. They did it!  Soon, they were trying to sing in three parts and eventually, four parts!  They sang at church and a few private parties and were invited to be on the Eugene Jelesnick Talent Showcase TV Show in Salt Lake City, Utah; the same show my brothers and I did when we were young!  Bob Hope saw them, put them on his National TV Special and we have been chasing after them ever since!

While they were young, we gave them piano lessons and encouraged their interests in music but Suzanne and I also knew that they needed good educations and tried to keep their music as a hobby.  While maintaining somewhat normal lives and going to school, they had great opportunities and success especially in England with four top twenty hit songs with videos.

Soon, it was time for Michael, the oldest, to serve as a missionary for our church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, which he chose to do and left the group to serve for two years in Denmark speaking Danish.  When it was time, Nathan also did the same and went to Chile.  Doug went to South Africa, David to Spain. Scott served in Paraguay and Jon went to to Brazil.  Alex served stateside in Atlanta, Georgia and our youngest, Tyler, is yet to be seen.

When  our boys returned from their mission calls they went to college and majored in various areas of business yet became very good at entertaining with a love for music.  Suzanne and I had both encouraged them to get “Real Jobs” by getting a good education, and most of them did.  Still, some have pursued music careers and we now see their talent and love for music showing up n their own children!

I realize how important it is for fathers to “set the stage” of life for your children to follow as they may become like you.  

Fathers and sons can play a critical role in helping each other become the best that they can be.  As we sit shoulder to shoulder in worshiping our Lord at church as priesthood holders or ‘Side by Side’ singing together on stage, we realize that we with our families can also become part of an eternal family of God.

M. Russell Nelson, a friend and an Apostle of our church reminds us that,  “Father and sons need to talk together and possibly work together as there is no other relationship quite like that which can and should exist between a boy and his dad.  It can be one of the most nurturing, joyful relationships in life, one that can have profound impact on who boys become and also who dads become.  We are all on a journey with Dads a little further down the road, but none of us has yet arrived at our final destination.  We are all in the process of becoming who we will one day be. Fathers and sons can play a critical role in helping each other become the best that they can be.

I know that father-son relationships are never perfect, but it is possible if you will put forth the effort to make it happen.

Young men, you are your father’s pride and joy. In you they see a promising future and their hope for a better, improved version of themselves. Your accomplishments are a joy to them. Your worries and problems are their worries and problems.

Fathers, you are the primary model of manhood for your sons. You are their most meaningful mentor, and believe it or not, you are their hero in countless ways. Your words and your example are a great influence on them.”

I appreciate what Brother Nelson says, “I believe that by doing these three simple things you can make your relationship with your father even better than it is right now.

First, trust your father. He is not perfect, but he loves you and would never do anything he didn’t think was in your best interest. So talk to him. Share your thoughts and feelings, your dreams and your fears. The more he knows about your life, the better chance he has to understand your concerns and to give you good counsel. When you put your trust in your dad, he will feel the responsibility of that trust and try harder than ever to understand and to help. As your father, he is entitled to inspiration on your behalf. His advice to you will be the heartfelt expressions of someone who knows and loves you. Your dad wants more than anything for you to be happy and successful, so why would you not want to trust someone like that? Boys, trust your dad.

Second, take an interest in your father’s life. Ask about his job, his interests, his goals. How did he decide to do the work that he does? What was he like when he was your age? How did he meet your mother? And as you learn more about him, you may find that his experiences help you to better understand why he responds the way that he does. Watch your dad. Watch how he treats your mother. Watch how he performs his Church callings. Watch how he interacts with other people. You will be surprised what you learn about him just by watching him and listening to him. Think about what you don’t know about him and find out. Your love, admiration, and understanding will increase by what you learn. Boys, be interested in your dad’s life.

My Father and brother Wayne.

And third, ask your father for advice. Let’s be honest: he is probably going to give you his advice whether you ask for it or not, but it just works so much better when you ask! Ask for his advice on Church activity, on classes, on friends, on school, on dating, on sports or other hobbies. Ask for his counsel on your Church assignments, on preparing for your mission, on decisions or choices you have to make. Nothing shows respect for another person as much as asking for his advice, because what you are really saying when you ask for advice is, “I appreciate what you know and the experiences you have had, and I value your ideas and suggestions.” Those are nice things for a father to hear from his son.

In my experience, fathers who are asked for advice try harder to give good, sound, useful counsel. By asking your father for advice, you not only receive the benefit of his input, but you also provide him with a little extra motivation to strive to be a better father and a better man. He will think more carefully about whatever it is that he advises, and he will work harder to “walk the talk.” Young men, ask your dad for advice!

OK, fathers, now it’s your turn. Let’s talk about some things you can do to enhance your relationship with your sons. You will notice that there is some linkage between the three suggestions I am going to give you and the suggestions I just gave your sons. That isn’t coincidental.

First, fathers, listen to your sons—really listen to them. Ask the right kind of questions, and listen to what your sons have to say each time you have a few minutes together. You need to know—not to guess but to know—what is going on in your son’s life. Don’t assume that you know how he feels just because you were young once. Your sons live in a very different world from the one in which you grew up. As they share with you what’s going on, you will have to listen very carefully and without being judgmental in order to understand what they are thinking and experiencing.

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Father often took us fishing. Alan, Merrill, Wayne.

Find your own best way to connect. Some fathers like to take their sons fishing or to a sporting event. Others like to go on a quiet drive or work side by side in the yard. Some find their sons enjoy conversations at night just before going to bed. Do whatever works best for you. A one-on-one relationship should be a routine part of your stewardship with your sons. Every father needs at least one focused, quality conversation with his sons every month during which they talk about specific things such as school, friends, feelings, video games, text messaging, worthiness, faith, and testimony. Where or when this happens isn’t nearly as important as the fact that it happens.

Father taught us to work but listened.

And oh, how fathers need to listen.
Remember, conversation where you do 90 percent of the talking is not a conversation. Use the word “feel” as often as you comfortably can in your discussions with your sons. Ask: “How do you feel about what you’re learning in that class?” “How do you feel about what your friend said?” “How do you feel about your priesthood and the Church?”

Don’t think you have to try to fix everything or solve everything during these visits. Most of the time, the best thing you can do is just listen. Fathers who listen more than they talk find that their sons share more about what is really going on in their lives. Dads, listen to your sons.

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Second, pray with and for your sons. Give them priesthood blessings. A son who is worried about a big exam or a special event will surely benefit from a father’s priesthood blessing. Occasions like the start of a new school year, a birthday, or as he begins to date may be opportune times to call upon the Lord to bless your son. One-on-one prayer and the sharing of testimonies can draw you closer to each other as well as closer to the Lord.

I am mindful that many of you fathers suffer heartache over sons who have strayed and are being captured by the world, just as Alma and Mosiah worried about their sons. Continue to do all you can to maintain strong family relationships. Never give up, even when fervent prayer in their behalf is all you can do. These precious sons of yours are your sons forever! Fathers, pray with and bless your sons.  

Third, dare to have the “big talks” with your sons. You know what I mean: talks about drugs and drinking, about the dangers of today’s media—the Internet, cyber technologies, and pornography—and about priesthood worthiness, respect for girls, and moral cleanliness. While these should not be the only subjects you talk about with your sons, please don’t shy away from them. Your boys need your counsel, guidance, and input on these subjects. As you talk about these very important matters, you will find that the trust between you will flourish.

I am especially concerned that we communicate openly and clearly with our sons about sexual matters. Your sons are growing up in a world that openly embraces and flaunts early, casual, and thoughtless promiscuity. Your sons simply cannot avoid the blatant sexual imagery, messages, and enticements that are all around them. Fathers and Church leaders need to have open and frequent discussions that teach and clarify how young men of the priesthood handle this issue. Be positive about how wonderful and beautiful physical intimacy can be when it happens within the bounds the Lord has set, including temple covenants and commitments of eternal marriage. Studies show that the biggest deterrent to casual sexual activity is a wholesome attitude that connects such personal relationships with genuine commitment and mature love. Fathers, if you have not had this “big talk” with your sons, please do so, and do it soon.

And fathers, the three suggestions I made to you moments ago absolutely apply to your relationships with your returned missionary sons. Listen to them, and connect with them in regular, focused conversation. Talk with them in depth about their feelings and desires. Pray with them, and give them blessings as they face the important decisions in their future.

Alex at Temple Leaving on Mission.

Elder Ballard says to young men like mine who are returned missionaries to “trust your father. You can be closer to him now than ever before regardless of what your relationship was like before your mission. During the next few years, you will make the most important decisions of your life. Along with prayer to your Heavenly Father, advice from your earthly father can help you make those decisions concerning your education, career choice, and marriage. The most important decision you will make in this life is the decision to marry the right girl in the temple! While no one should rush this significant decision, all returned missionaries should be working on it. Be where you can meet the right kind of friends. And go on dates. Hanging out is not the way, nor is it enough! Courting seems to be a lost art. Rediscover it. It really works! Ask your fathers—they know! Do not drift to the ways of the world. Rather, maintain the dignity and the Spirit you enjoyed on your mission. The Church will need your leadership in the future.”

(Alan, My Father George, My son Scott – 3 generations)


I have never been a father before.  I have watched my father while growing up and how he handled problems, made decisions, and handled situations as I grew older.  With my eight sons, I have often tried to remember those times and have applied it to my own sons.  I remind them that this life is a time to make choices; that those choices that we made in heaven before we came here determined where we are in this life.  And, the choices we make here will decide which mansion in heaven we go to after we die and return to our Heavenly parents.  I cannot tell them who to love.  I cannot tell them what you should do for a living.  But what I can do is show continual love and support and be there to catch them should they fall.

We need to make our homes a place of refuge from the storm, which is increasing in intensity all about us. Even if the smallest openings are left unattended, negative influences can penetrate the very walls of our homes.


Alan Osmond
For the Family

M. Russell Ballard
A Talk from General Conference

Women In Our Lives. – Daughters Of God.

By on Jan 17 in Blog, Videos tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DkUwh1YUMtE&feature=channel[/youtube]

I love this girl of mine!  She is my best friend, my partner, my eternal companion, the mother of my children, my heart, my mind, my love, my life, forever my eternity!

When I was almost twenty five, I was lonely and writing in my journal one night after I had prayed to my Heavenly Father and letting Him know that I had dated a lot, kept my eyes open, went to church, dances, concerts, events, and had really tried to find that special one who I would marry and would live with me eternally.

I prayed to Father and said, “I’m really lonely. Would you help me and lead me to find the one… that girl who is right for me and me for her?”

Well, one week later, I met Suzanne.  My journal reads, “Tonight I met a ‘real girl’!”  Yes, Suzanne swept me off of my feet and we dated for about six months, the best 6 months of my life.  I was then going on a world concert tour with my family and I wanted her to go with me.  I didn’t know if we would ever be able to go around the world again and I knew I couldn’t taker her as a girl friend because it wouldn’t ‘look right’!  But, I knew that she was the one for me and that I loved her . . .  so I asked her to marry me!

After she fasted and prayed about it, she humbled me by saying yes!  I promised her to be true and faithful and to take good care of her and that we would marry  for time and for all eternity in a Temple of the Lord.  She was heaven sent and has blessed both of our lives with eight wonderful sons.

As a song writer, I wrote several songs about Suzanne, or at least with her in mind.  Some songs were written before I knew her but as I would write, I would picture what I thought she would look like in my mind and expressed how I felt.  A few songs were:

“Girl”.  “That’s My Girl,  “True Love”,  “You’re Gonna Get Me To Heaven”, “Whose Gonna Get Suzanne”,  “Darlin”, “Same Girl”,   “Carrie”, “Catch Me Baby”, “Do You Want Me”, “It’s You Babe”,  “You’re Mine”, “Love Me” ,  “Sho’ Would Be Nice”,  “Tears On My Pillow”,  “Trust My Love”,  “We Can Make It Together”, “What Could ItBe”, “Big Al, His Gal, and His Pals”, for a few.

Besides being my wife and a wonderful women, Suzanne is my better half, a mother, companion, housekeeper, cook, shopper, nurse, councilor, chauffeur, baby sitter, hand holder, book keeper, psychologist, designer, seamstress, janitor, secretary, advisor, motivator, security guard, shopper, consultant, photographer, teacher, relief society president, temple worker, back scratcher, my right hand, watchful eye, listening ear, a feel bad hugger, nutritionist, grocery shopper, care giver, story teller, scripture quoter, financial accountant , dancer, piano player, singer, violinist, travel booker, good looker, great kisser, computer wiz, not in show biz, and most importantly . . . . she is the one that I love!

With all that she does, I really could not afford her but, I can’t afford to ever lose her, so I’m just gonna mind my business, work hard and be good!    :-)

“Sex Isn’t Secret” – It’s SACRED!

By on Dec 04 in Daily Inspiration tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off

Sex is sacred . . . Misused it’s Sin.

Become a Creator . . . and Be like Him.

Saved for Marriage. . . A Man and his Wife.

It’s God’s Plan . . .to Bring forth Life.

A Child is Born . . . To find a Home.

Will he be loved . . . or Left Alone?

Shamed or Wanted . . . It’s up to You . . . it’s

Part of Living . . .and What you Do.

Brings up questions . . .of Why you are Here

Where you came from . . . and Who you Fear.

Catch the vision . . . Remember Why?

You chose living . . . and Knew you’d Die.

It’s no secret . . . don’t Cry or Moan.

Life is a Test . . . you’re Not Alone.

Make each moment . . . and Every Day.

Live for Jesus . . . He Is The Way!

Written by Alan Osmond
All Rights Reserved

(c) Copyright 2005
Deut 6:13 Thou shalt fear the Lord thy God,
and serve him, and shalt swear by his name.