By Alan on Jun 06 in Blog tagged computer, connected, destroy, documenting, engaged, Family, focused, for families, get involved, learn, mobile, One Heart, our family, personal information, photos, secure, share, shared publicly, SmartTV, social network, social squeeze, society, stadium of Fire, tablet, The Family, trust, worry | No Comments

We Need To Protect The Family!

Social Networks Come and Go – But Families Are Forever!

OurFamily.com is documenting each family’s legacy for future generations an is the Social Network you can trust!  It is built from the ground up for families so they don’t have to worry about photos or personal information being shared publicly – It all stays in The Family.

Gather data from existing social streams into one central family-focused network.  It doesn’t matter if your children are on Instagram or Facebook.  Their info can automatically be shared on OurFamily!

We believe that families are the primary building blocks of society. But the frantic pace of modern life is destroying the family’s ability to stay engaged and connected.

Unlike friend-focused or business-focused social media, OurFamily is being made for Families. We will provide you with a secure way to explore, learn, and share about your family’s fascinating past, living present and exciting future together.

OurFamily is a startup dedicated to connecting families and allowing family members to engage with each daily using mobile, tablet, computer, and SmartTV.

We’re currently working with investors to ensure OurFamily’s success.

Yes, TheFamily.com and our non-profit charity, One Heart Foundation, are joining in support of this NEW Social Media site just for families.  Whereas, TheFamily.com is for ALL FAMILIES and helps “Strengthen The Family Physically, Mentally, Socially, Spiritually, and Financially and One Heart Foundation helps with Strengthening The Family by raising funds in support of it.  But, we see a real need for families to stay in touch daily!  To do that, we’re partnering with OurFamily.com to build a safe and secure way for families to communicate and share and we’d like your help!

OurFamily.com is being developed just for families that want privacy and secure protection in sharing pictures, music, and other social connecting where  selective and privacy controls within the family and invited members can be achieved.

If you are interested in being involved and helping move this development forward, please click here on OurFamily.com!

OurFamily.com is also being featured at Stadium of Fire and in their magazine this year with invites to to all families and investors to get involved.

Shouldn’t you get your family involved?

    For The Family

By Alan on Apr 01 in Blog tagged as one, charity, Enoch, everlasting, foundation, giving, helping, One Heart, One Mind, pure in heart, The Family, the way, united | 5 Comments

We Are Of One Heart  - TheFamily - The Neighbor - Standards and Practices -
Proclamation - Board Members –  Family History - Strengthening Financially -
Health Problems - The Body and Mind doTERRAtory - FACEBOOK

The Family Awards

“CHARITY IS THE WORK OF THE HEART.”

“Blessed are those who can give without remembering and take without forgetting.”

MAKE A DONATION!

 

Thank You!

 

One Heart is not about fixing or prevent heart attacks or other heart diseases but, is about mending broken hearts and contrite spirits and in working together as “One” with other charities whose purposes and hearts are of the same common desires.

We help individuals with heardened hearts become  more caring and loving people filled with love and unified giving service and purpose. We help “Strengthen The Family Physically, Mentally, Spiritually, Socially, and Financially” and in becoming a “pure hearted people.

One Heart Foundation is a public 501(c)(3) non-profit organization for “Strengthening The Family” with offices in Utah and Missouri! Alan and Suzanne Osmond started formed this organization to help raise money for this purpose and to work with other charities who are “Of One Heart” in helping families.  They and their board take no personal fees and direct all monies towards the cause.

There are many causes and ‘ways’ that we help The Family.

One Heart has helped build schools for children in underprivileged areas; provided fresh water sources to families in need; purchased hundreds of hearing aids for deaf or hearing impaired children; organized thousands of knitters in making over 100,000+ warm caps for homeless families; donated food and clothing items to Native American Families; raised money to support sick children in Children’s Hospitals; awarded ‘The Family Award‘ to several individuals and families who live the life and support “The Family”; created and produced fund raisers and live events like Stadium of Fire for Strengthening The Family Socially so families can spend time together; publish FREE Newsletters and various websites promoting The Family such as TheFamily.com, The Neighbor.com, Deaf.net, OneHeart.org, NOIZ.com, Osmond.org for Family History, WhyIAmAMormon.com to strengthen The Family Spiritually, and more.

We also have a for profit effort to ‘Strengthen The Family – Financially’ by creating job opportunities, saving money on services you already use, and the way to earn extra income at Osmond.net.

Our mission is to provide ‘The Way’ for families to become stronger in this ever challenging world.  We endorse marriage and hard work and believe that the family is God’s plan of life.  By working together with other charities with their particular service(s) that they offer, we can become more affective, and “of One Heart” in purpose reaching our goals.    Together, we seek to bring success to these worthwhile causes, while we ourselves engage in needed humanitarian projects!

RESCUE THE FAMILY FROM THE WORLD! – WE MUST DO MORE!

We need to get our hearts set; the condition of one’s heart needs to be in the right place. Let’s humble ourselves!

Scripture teaches that, “…those who are desirous to come into the fold of God, and to be called His People, … Yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea and comfort those that stand in need of comfort.”  Mourn, listen, feed, and help comfort those hearts and hands that are streatched out. We all are human and God’s children.  We all have difficulties. Help your neighbors…with Pure and Thankful Hearts!

“Charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things”.

Moroni 7:45; 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

“Strengthening The Family“

All Rights Reserved © One Heart Foundation
 

 

By Alan on Feb 07 in Blog tagged candor, forthrightness, goodness, honesty, honorableness, incorruption, integrity, love, One Heart, princile, righteouseness, sincerity, straightforwardness, urity, virte | Comments Off

The Integrity Of One’s Heart

in·teg·ri·ty  [in-teg-ri-tee]
noun

1. adherence to moral and ethical principles;

soundness of moral character; honesty.

“The Lord shall judge the people:
judge me, O Lord, according to
my righteousness, and according
to mine integrity that is in me.”  
Psalms 7:8

When the Love for another makes a stranger your brother, then you’re One.

For The Family

By Alan on Aug 24 in Blog tagged brother, emergency, every thing, Family, Mormon, needful, now, o be wise, One Heart, prepare, sister, spiritually, water | Comments Off

“PREPARE EVERY NEEDFUL THING”

“One Heart . . .What you’re feeling is
One Heart  . . . When the
Love for another makes a
Stranger your brother,
Then you’re ONE!”

Be Prepared!
http://OBWise.com 

Have Water!
http://surewatertanks.com

Know some Mormons.
http://mormon.org/worship/

Prepare Spiritually!
What is the Purpose of Life?

Alan Osmond
A Mormon – For The Family

By Alan on Jul 16 in Blog tagged a sacred time, adjustments being married, Alan's poem, ball parks, bannana splits, being in demand, Big Al, birthdays, BYU Cheerleader, chores, Christmas Eve, clean their rooms, consequences, cousins, deprive something, discipline, eight sons, family traditions, gives me order, grandparents, His Gal and His Pals, home, interview, large family, life began after I fell n love with you, live very normally, measure up, moment's notice, mother, Nativity set and story, non-profit charity, odd hours, One Heart, pajamas, people watching, plays violin, responsibility, reunions, ride horses, schedules, sent to room, soccer games, Suzanne Osmond, temple ordinance workers, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, The World, time for dinner, time-out, traditions, traveling, Valentines Day, water and snow skiing | 6 Comments

Today is Suzanne’s and my 38th Wedding Anniversary!  I repost this article which I wrote a while back about how Suzanne and I met and how the Lord brought us together to create an eternal marriage and family.   Oh how I love my wife Suzanne!

An interview with Suzanne Osmond given several
years ago as she was raising her family.

Suzanne was born on May 11, 1953 in Payson, Utah. She is the third oldest of seven children born to Kenneth J. Pinegar and Ruth Richardson Pinegar. She married Alan Osmond on July 16, 1974 and together have eight sons.

As a young woman, her favorite sports were water and snow skiing. She also loved to ride horses.  Suzanne is also a very good piano player and Alan really loves to hear her play.  She is also playing violin in a local orchestra.

She was really active in school. She was a baton twirler and a cheerleader for her high school band and also a BYU cheerleader.

Suzanne is 5’5″ tall and she has blue eyes and blonde hair.

Suzanne remembers, “Seven days before they were married, Alan sent Suzanne seven red roses with a note that said:

“For every day there is a rose,

For every rose there is time;

And when they’ve all been counted for,

I’ll come and make you mine.”

Isn’t that romantic?”

While in Europe, Alan and Suzanne celebrated being married for one month by sending a postcard to themselves at their new home in Provo, Utah telling each other how much in love they were and then signing it “Big Al and His Gal.” After having several sons, they have also added more words to it that reads,  ”Big Al, His Gal, and His Pals.”

The first time Suzanne saw Alan perform was the day  they were married!  She sat in the audience with her “mouth wide open.”   Afterwards she called her mother to tell her about it.  All she could say was, “I’m so amazed, I can’ t even talk!”

Suzanne said, “There’s never a dull moment being married to Alan. Alan is one who is always busy and involved doing all kinds of projects. He has such a creative mind. Its fun to watch him create and see his creations come about.

I’m a very structured person and like my schedules. Alan has taught me to be more spontaneous and just flow with what’s happening or with what his ideas might be. Being married to an Osmond, I’ve been able to do a lot of traveling and see the world, and experience things in that realm that I never had before. I’ve met interesting people too. I remember when we were in the Middle-East and able to meet with Mrs. Sadat. We also met with Prime Minister Begin, President Reagan and other people. That’s been interesting for me, to be in circles where there have been influential and important people. To be able to meet them and see them first-hand.

The toughest adjustment to being married into a family that’s in the entertainment field is being in demand a lot.  You have to be able to pick up and go at a moment’s notice sometimes. The spontaneity has been the thing that I’ve probably had to adjust most to and learn to accept the most. They sometimes keep odd hours, which has been another thing with which to adjust. It’s also having people who are probably watching every move that you make, and feeling like there are always eyes observing everything that you do. You really feel an obligation to set a good example at all times.

I think each one of our boys has the knowledge that there are a lot of people watching what they do and expect a certain standard out of them. So, I think that has actually helped. They have more than just their parents expecting them to measure up to those standards. There are a lot of other people who are leaning on them and watching them. They feel that and they are aware of that responsibility.

Being the mother of eight boys is very, very busy. Boys are very loud and very physical and always hungry! So you’re always running to keep up with them and making sure their stomachs are full. We’ve spent many, many hours at ballparks and soccer games. I don’t know what it would be like to have a daughter. I just can’t imagine that because our home is so boy-oriented.

As a family, we live very normally at home. Our boys do chores. They come home and do their homework and help out with younger brothers. They have to get up, make their beds, and clean their rooms just like any other teenager. It’s the same kind of normal life around this household as what I grew up with so I don’t think there’s anything different here than any other home.”

How do you handle discipline?

Suzanne explains, “There are always consequences for everything that we do. There are good consequences for good things and not-so-good consequences for when we do things that are wrong. The best thing is to take away something, deprive them of an activity or something they want to have. It makes them stop and think. For the little boys, usually they’re tired and so they are sent to their room and have to sit on their beds. A lot of times I’ll have books there that they can sit, read and calm down; think about what’s going on. A lot of people refer to that as a time-out period and I think it helps to take that time to let tempers settle down and think about what the problem is and find solutions.

It is important to manage your time with a large family.  That’s why I like schedules. If I don’t have a schedule then I get frustrated. I have to have order and know what the next move is going to be so that I can plan. You have to control your time. It’s the only way you can get through without having the chaos that can come so easily. With a lot of people going a lot of different directions, that can happen very easily. There’s usually a set time for dinner that we like to gather for every evening as a family. That’s an important time and a sacred time in our home, to have dinner together. That keeps me on track. It gives me order in my life.“

What are some of your family traditions?

“We love birthdays. We always celebrate birthdays and make it really fun for the person who is having the birthday. My mother always calls on the telephone with a certain song she always played for us when I was growing up. Now she does it with the grandkids on their birthdays.

Christmas is probably our very favorite season of all. On Christmas Eve, everyone gets to open one gift and it’s always pajamas so they always look nice for the family videos the next morning. We always read the Christmas story and have a Nativity set that we use as we tell that story. Alan started a tradition several years ago of having banana splits on Christmas Eve, so that’s the last thing we do is have banana splits. Then everybody hustles off to bed so that Santa can come. On Christmas morning, the kids get up and they’re filmed walking into Christmas for the first time and all the excitement with that.

We also have family reunions throughout the year and that’s always fun to see everyone and catch up on brothers and sisters and cousins.”

Currently . . .

Now, after Alan and I have spent 38 wonderful married years together, we have 8 sons, 7 daughters-in-law and have become grandparents to 20 grandchildren with 2 on the way!  We continue having family nights with many of the same family traditions today and we love life.

Several years ago, we started a non-profit charity called One Heart for Strengthening Families.  One Heart truly describes the kind of marriage and family that Alan and I share together and know that our family will be together for all eternity .”

Alan and Suzanne serve as temple ordinance workers in one of the temples of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.”

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Alan & Suzanne Osmond
For The Family

By Alan on May 01 in Blog tagged Alan Osmond, Ample Harvest, community, donate excess garden produce, food pantry, gardeners, help feed families, One Heart, oneheart.org, sharing their harvest, theNeighbor.com | Comments Off

 Gardeners Sharing Their Ample Harvest With
A Community Food Pantry

AmpleHarvest.org LetsMove Challenge

AmpleHarvest.org is a nationwide campaign that enables millions of home gardeners to donate excess garden produce to local food pantries. This donated produce is often the only fresh food available at the food pantries that 1 out of every 6 Americans relies on to help feed their family.

AmpleHarvest.org’s “No Food Left Behind” concept is designed to educate, encourage and enable growers nationwide to help their community by helping them reach into their backyards instead of their back pockets to help their neighbors in need.

Let’s Move! encourages people to eat healthy food, but for the tens of millions of Americans who simply can’t afford it, AmpleHarvest.org enables what Let’s Move! and the First Lady advocate.

America’s challenge is not that we don’t have enough healthy food. Rather, it is that we don’t know that the healthy food we need is already in our community and available at no cost from local growers. AmpleHarvest.org solved that problem.

You can help in your own community.

**Urge a local food pantry to register at AmpleHarvest.org.** 

Find the food pantry in your community – possibly in a nearby house of worship, YMCA or other civic location. Give them the www.AmpleHarvest.org/pantry flier and urge them to register ASAP. Let them know they don’t need refrigeration for freshly harvested produce, they don’t need the Internet and that AmpleHarvest.org is totally FREE!

**Help others learn about AmpleHarvest.org.** 

Put www.AmpleHarvest.org/blogarticle in your blog or newsletter.

**Help local gardeners learn to share their garden bounty**
Print the www.AmpleHarvest.org/gardenshop flier and post it in local garden shops, nurseries, community and bulletin boards to help growers help the hungry.

**Help publicize the AmpleHarvest.org Campaign** 

Ask your local media to visit www.AmpleHarvest.org/press and do a story about people in the community wanting fresh produce for their families from the local food pantry

**Lastly, (Click HERE)
Please vote for AmpleHarvest.org

in this challenge!** 

Every vote helps increase the chances that more people in more communities will get access to fresh food… many for the first time.

This is Alan Osmond inviting you to support AmpleHarvest.org/VOTE to bring awareness and food from those who have it to those who are in need!

We are OF ONE HEART when we LOVE
THE NEIGHBOR as ourselves.

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Alan Osmond
For The Family 

By Alan on Apr 16 in Blog tagged adolescents, boys, BYU, child, communicate, dad, daughters, emotion, example, Family, Father, fathering, feelings, friends, girl, hazerdous, hero, independent, mom, needs, One Heart, relationship, rewarding, sit down, Son, talk, teenagers, Today, trust, works, youth | Comments Off

TheFamily.com has a working relationship with BYU’s School of Family Life, and a group called ‘Father Work‘ and have invited them to join us here with some of their content.  They are “Of One Heart” in “Strengthening Families”.

Fathering Teenagers

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• “The most important…work you and I will ever do will be within the walls of our own homes.”-Harold B. Lee.
  
• Content
  
  • Overview
  • Stories
  • Conclusion
• Overview
  Fathering teenagers often seems hazardous to one’s health, but it can also be rewarding and enjoyable. This is a time of life when teenagers are searching for an identity and a group to associate with. They are seeking answers to questions such as,”Who am I? What is my place in life?” and they are starting to think more for themselves.Fathering is important for today’s youth. Teenagers need someone to look to as an example for advice and support and who will listen and try to understand. Fathers can help their teenagers develop a commitment to a chosen value system and a stable identity that will protect them as they mature towards adult lives.A father’s support during these tumultuous times can be especially important in not only giving his son or daughter a sense of security in dealing with various peer and cultural pressures, but also in developing the self-discipline and moral judgement to rise above that peer pressure (Biller, 1993, p. 71, 181).

  Stories
  Many fathers mention time as an important aspect of fathering adolescents, not just time spent with their teenagers but time made available for them by their children. One father notes that one of the most meaningful areas in his relationship with his daughter is his availability to sit down and communicate with her about whatever she wants to talk about.

  Snarey (1993, p. 161) suggests that nurturant father-daughter relationships facilitate healthy social and emotional development of the daughter. These stories illustrate how Chris and his daughter Elizabeth have become emotionally close during these times, demonstrating the need for relationship work during adolescence.

  “There have been times when she has had some problems. It would take her a long while to get around to talking to me, but sometimes she did sit down and we would talk–not that I came to any conclusions. I think she came to more of the conclusions on her own regarding the problems that she had. But I was there just to talk with her and listen. Again, those seem to be the special times that she and I have had.

  “Now when she wants to know something, it’s mainly about boys. My two older daughters want to know why boys are the way they are. I ask, “What do you mean?” And so they bring up a particular instance, and so I have to sit down with both of them and say, “Well, they come from a different background than I do. The way they’re feeling about things might be entirely different.

  “But, here are some of the things that I went through at that age.” I let them come up with their own conclusions at that point because I don’t know what he’s thinking! Every once in a while she still has problems and will come and talk, and we talk them through. Those are special times. They are also very personal times. I would say that those are the times I really feel close to my daughters.”

  Snarey (1993, p. 277) suggests that men who had active fathers are more likely to be active with their own children. One father told about his experience of having a dad that was always there for him.

  “He’s always been there. I’ll just always remember him as being there, no matter what. We were in a state championship game in football and it came down to a last-second field goal. I was the field goal kicker and I missed it. I went home and was going to go with some friends somewhere. Dad was out cutting wood and feeding the horses, and I went and talked to him. He just said, “Well, sometimes you do and sometimes you don’t.” I could always talk to Dad and tell him anything, no matter what I did, whether it was wrong or right. I could always tell Dad, and he always stood behind me.

  Trust is very important in a relationship, especially a parent-child relationship. The following is a story about a man who was not trusted by his father and what that meant to him:

  “We were cleaning up in the back yard, a Saturday activity for everyone (or else), and I walked toward the garbage can. The garbage can was on the corner of the garage and at the garbage can I saw a dime. I got it and was happy to see it, and the next thing I knew [my father] was there questioning me where I got it. I said, “I found it out on the garbage can.” I don’t remeber exactly what he said, but it was basically, “You’re a liar. Tell me the truth–where did you come up with this?” I guess that hurt quite a bit….Painful things stand out. I think it’s disbelief. Why doesn’t a parent believe what a child is saying? I hear it in myself.

  Biller (1993, p.76) suggests that if the father has a warm relationship with his children, they will be more likely to respond positively to many dimensions of his behavior, such as his moral tenets and patterns of relating to others. Adolescents who are searching for an identity will pattern their lives after those whom they trust. Teenagers watch their parents closely in looking for values and standards. Jeff, a father in New Zealand, recalls his father’s example to him and his brothers. This story illustrates mentoring work, as the father passes to his children morals he holds to be important.

  “He always taught us to be honest. One time I remember that there was someone that he was working for that wanted a bunch of extra things done, so my dad did the work. Later, when Dad charged him for it, the guy said that he wouldn’t pay–and then his wife got in on it. She said no, that my dad had quoted a different price, but she didn’t take into account all of this other work, so they didn’t pay. That guy was a mechanic. My dad had some of his cars being worked on in his shop.

  “After the guy had worked on them, this lady from the shop called and said that they hadn’t charged us enough and it would be an extra forty or so dollars. My brother and I were really brassed off [upset] because we thought that, well, he wasn’t paying his bill–why should we pay them? My dad said no, that it was up to us to be the honest ones and pay. I think we went down there and paid the money. That guy never did pay us back for the extra work. And yet, my dad said that it was not for us to judge that guy and that, if we pay, the Lord would help us.”

  Snarey (1993, p.157) suggests that fathers continue to be models for their adolescent children even though these children are trying to become independent of their parents. When both the father and the mother are actively involved parents, their child is much more likely to develop into a socially and morally mature adult (Biller, 1993, p.76). Being active in the lives of children is an important element ofrelationship work, as these next three stories show. Shawn, a father of two, shares an experience when his father helped him see the importance of telling the truth.

  “I remember coming home after being out with some friends; I’d had a little bit to drink. . . . Mother always waited up for me and Dad slept. If Mom ever mentioned anything bad, he’d wake right up. If Mom said, “Have you been doing this–?” then I’d hear, “What?” coming from Dad’s side of the bed. Although I can’t remember the details of that night very well, I do remember that I felt more tension than I ever had felt between Dad and me. Dad left for work at about 6:00 the next morning, as usual.

  “As I was about to leave for school, Mom said, “Make sure you come home right after school because your Dad wants to talk to you.” The worst thing about it was that at first, when they’d asked me the night before if I’d been drinking, I had said, “no.” Then I’d started thinking about ways that I was going to get out of telling the truth, but I’d realized I couldn’t, so I’d just decided to tell them what really happened. I remember the disappointment.”

  “When I got home from school that afternoon, he hadn’t come home yet. It was the longest half-hour I’ve ever waited in my life. He came home, went in and gave Mom a kiss and talked to Mom, then said, “Mark, come in the room.” He didn’t ask me why I had been drinking; instead he simply said, “Why did you lie to me?” Those were his first words. “Why did you lie to me?” I wasn’t ready for that question.

  “That’s all he wanted to know, and I felt like the biggest heel right then. It wasn’t so much the drinking; it was that I had lied to him. That’s probably the farthest away that I’ve ever felt from him, doing that–lying to him. I hope he taught me a lesson there–to always tell the truth, no matter what the circumstance may be. Hopefully, when my kids come to me and tell me the truth, I won’t act in a way so that they won’t want to tell their dad the truth.”

  The following is a story of a father who learned how he wished to discipline his children by an experience he had with his own father:

  “He slapped me once. I can’t even remember what I said, but we were in the car and I mouthed something back at him. He slapped me in the face. What I remember is how awful that was. It was more devastating than any ten spankings he’d ever given me in my life. It was very personal, being in my face, and he had never done that before. I guess I must have just pushed him right over the edge, but I learned something from that which you didn’t have to draw out of me….It is not worth what it does.

  “I’m not faulting him for doing it either. There have been times that I’ve wanted to slap my kids. I don’t think that he was really being a bad father, but I understood something about what it felt like to be on the receiving end of that which made me not want to do it to mine.”

  Fathers can be an emotional support to their teenagers by being there in those times when they are needed most. Some fathers recall times when they needed their fathers’ support and it wasn’t there.

  “I remember a time when I felt emotionally distant from my father. . . I’m not sure if he was aware that I knew of the situation. It was a case, because of the things that I was involved in, that somebody had the audacity to go to my father and tell him that I was gay. My father did nothing. He didn’t say anything. He never said anything to me, but he didn’t say anything to the guy, and that made me feel like he didn’t really care one way or the other what people said about me, and didn’t really know me at all. In those times if you were into drama, dancing and those things you had to be gay.

  “Something had to be wrong with you. So something was definitely wrong and you had to get a little hassled. The thing was that the man had the nerve to say it to my father, not to someone else on the side but directly to him, and then sit there and laugh about it. And my father did nothing. I remember that particular thing because it hurt me and it made me feel like maybe I was adopted, or maybe he just didn’t care for me. And the other thing is maybe he believed it.”

  One father, Shawn, tells of an experience when his father was there to support him and how he felt about it. This story illustrates the power of recreation work, as Shawn’s father took time to support him outside of his father’s daily routine.

  “The one (experience) that sticks out was when I was wrestling in high school. I was going for the state championship. He and all my brothers were there– there are six boys in the family, so there were five boys there with dad. You wrestle with all these other guys all year round, but he was there when I won. I didn’t care about everybody else– dad was there.”

  One of the most challenging things about fathering a teenager is dealing with their growing desire for independence. Fathers often provide support for a child’s developing autonomy (Parke, 1996, p.144). A father shares his experience when his 16-year-old daughter decided it was time for her to leave home. This story illustrates development work, as the father adapts to the changing needs of his daughter.

  “Parenting adolescents has been a challenge for me, but that hardly makes me unique. A couple of years ago my daughter Kathy, our oldest child, began chafing against parental monitoring and guidance. Nothing too unusual here. She was 15. Over time we gave her more and more “slack, ” eventually getting down to a couple of basic rules: let us know where you are and who you are with, let us know when we can expect you back, call if you’re going to be late, and “be good.”

  “We thought these were very minimal and reasonable rules, but it wasn’t enough for her; she needed to be on her own, completely unfettered by parental ties. We asked her if she thought other parents were more lenient than hers. She said all that she knew were stricter, but she still needed to have her freedom. She just had to be on her own.

  “The summer after her sophomore year in high school, she moved out and into a home with an adult friend and her husband (they have no children). We didn’t approve, but we could see that saying no would really sour our relationship with her. It was hard to say good-bye, even though she still lives close; we had thought we would have more time with her. It’s been especially hard on her mother, who grew up in much more challenging circumstances and didn’t get much parenting or have many of the advantages Kathy enjoyed.

  “I’ve learned first-hand about the process of adolescent autonomy, parental separation, and an emptying nest. I’ve learned that the timing of this process isn’t necessarily predictable and can be sooner than you think, leaving you unprepared. I think we made a good decision, and Kathy seems to be doing well, although it’s harder to know all that’s going on in her life now.

  “I guess I’ve learned that children grow up on different timetables and with different needs and desires. Parents need to respect them. Although we wish we had more time with her, we now realize that parents shouldn’t assume a fixed amount of time (18 years) to rear their children before launching. We hope letting her go will preserve a good relationship so that she will still come to us, physically and emotionally, in the future. That seems to be happening somewhat already.”

  Sometimes a little humor can be the best way to work with teenagers.

  “One day my Dad was working on the car I usually drove. He came inside wearing his work overalls, and I asked him how it was going. He said it was going fine, but he had to go to the store and get something to finish up. I said, “You’re not going to the store looking like that…how embarrassing! You look like a geek. Don’t tell anyone you’re my Dad.” I was kind of joking but I did think it would be embarrassing if he ran into someone I knew. A few minutes later he came out of his room with home-made signs taped to his front and back that said “I’m a geek” and “I’m Kimberlie’s Dad.”

  “He got in the car and was leaving and I was laughing. I was a little embarrassed but it also made me realize how dumb it was to worry about my friends knowing he was my Dad, even when he looked like a geek. I’m glad I could have a good, fun relationship with my Dad.”

  Many times fathers do things they regret later. The following is a story of a father who learned from what he felt was a mistake:

  “I know that self esteem is our most fragile commodity. So much of what we do as parents destroys self esteem “–clean up your room, it’s such a mess.” “–why did you only get a C in your math?” – etc. I will never forget when we were going to Philmont Scout Ranch to participate in the LDS scouter training. We had six of our children in the car with us. Mike (15) had bought a cowboy hat. He was pleased with himself in the hat. I thought he looked dumb–perhaps I was embarrassed. Well, I put him down over it, multiple times. I very much regret this….Now I deal so differently with the gang in similar situations. I try to be sensitive as to how I act over clothes or things that are important to them.”

  Conclusion
  FatherWork can be especially challenging when it involves teenage children who are stretching their wings towards greater independence. During these years, generative fathers can be the wind beneath the wings of their adolescent children as they fly farther and farther from the nest exploring a world full of opportunities and dangers. As teenagers search for a stable identity and choose a personal value system, fathers may feel unnoticed and distant from their teenagers. But as fathers work to build a strong and trusting relationship through the early years and continue to tell their maturing youth they love them, their teenagers will sense that quiet wind lifting their youthful wings and appreciate its strength and guidance. Although fathers walk a step behind their teenages during these years, their children can still recognize their dads as one of the true heroes in their lives.

More metaphors about fathering

By Alan on Feb 12 in Blog tagged 2002 Olympic Winter Games, Donny and Marie Osmond, George Osmond, Mitt Romney, Official 2002 Olympic Pin, official ambassadors, Olympic Committee, One Heart, Pin Collecting, remembering, Salt Lake City, strengthening families | Comments Off

Remembering 2002 Winter Games – Salt Lake City

ONE HEART ™

This One Heart Pin is an official 2002 Olympic pin.  It represents families and the mission of One Heart Foundation to “Strengthen Families”. How does one strengthen his family?  There are many ways and it takes several specialists to advise in areas of Physically, Mentally, Spiritually, Socially, Financially, Emotionally, etc.

(http://www.oneheart.org)

Mitt Romney

As I look back to when the Winter Olympics came to Salt Lake City, I remember being involved with the Mitt Romney and the Olympic Committee with our One Heart Charity for Strengthening Families.  My father, George Osmond and brother and sister Donny and Marie Osmond, helped carry the torch for the Opening Ceremones.

OSMOND FAMILY NAMED OFFICIAL AMBASSADORS

FOR FAMILY PIN COLLECTING

SALT LAKE CITY, Utah (April 21, 2001) – The Osmonds – Second Generation today were named the official ambassadors for family pin collecting for the 2002 Olympic Winter Games by Aminco International, the exclusive manufacturer of pins for the 2002 Olympic Winter Games.  The Osmonds – Second Generation – sons of original Osmond’s member, Alan Osmond – will work with Aminco to teach other families about pin trading as a family hobby.

As official pin ambassadors, the Osmonds – Second Generation will work with Aminco in the coming months to host family events focusing on pin collecting and trading.  The events will take place throughout Utah and will be free to all families.  Additionally, Aminco plans to partner with the One Heart Foundation, www.oneheart.org, a non-profit organization founded by Alan Osmond, dedicated to raising funds and awareness to strengthen families throughout North America.  Activities include releasing an official lapel pin with the One Heart logo and the 2002 Salt Lake Olympic mark next month.  One Heart also plans to have a pin collecting and trading page at the organization’s web site, located atwww.osmond.com.

“Family pin collecting is a way for families to spend time together through an exciting and rewarding hobby that attracts all generations,” said Osmond, founder and chairman of the One Heart Foundation.  “One Heart is committed to strengthening individuals by activities, such as pin collecting, that unite families.  My own family shares a passion for collecting pins and we are excited to be a part of this growing hobby.”

Performing at the Olympic  Governor’s Ball

Alan Osmond
For The Family

By Alan on Jan 26 in Blog tagged cannot exist without it, choose a president, choose ye this day, destiny of this world, forefathers, from on high, from within, fulfilling prophecies, heart is in tume with God, humble, in harmony, me and my house, One Heart, our nation is based on morality, outbursts defending their evil ways, polls, power, promised blessings, promptings of he Spirit, put on the armor of Christ, right choice, righteous, righteousness, see the future, seeks directiion, stand for truth, swayed by those with money, this promised land, votes, we are at war, we will serve the Lord, whom ye will serve | Comments Off

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By Alan on Jan 25 in Blog tagged Ample Harvest, Dennis Adamson, Dinner Garden, for the needy, free, FREE Newsletter, Gary Openheimer, harvest, Holly Hershberg, Master Gardener, NEED SEEDS, One Heart, solution to hunger, start planting now, The Family | Comments Off

Start Planning Now to Plant or Harvest for the Needy

Week 55 – By Dennis Adamson, Master Gardener

There was quite a response to my last 2 articles, ‘Gleaning – No Good Food To Go To Waste’ and ‘Planting Extra to Share with the Needy’ that I decided to modify this weeks article.

A reader in the United Kingdom said, “In the UK, where I live …in the Autumn I see orchards of apples and pears allowed to simply fall to the ground and rot…the waste infuriates me.”

Alan was so excited that he personally contacted Gary Oppenheimer, the executive director of AmpleHarvest.org, and talked to him for some time about how we can help them in our area.  Gary was the one that directed Alan to Dinnergarden.org.  Gary also said that the thefamily.com and OneHeart.org could help them get the word out to communities about their organization and help them get more pantries.

I followed Gary’s recommendation to check out The Dinner Garden at the above website.  I was impressed by what I found there and if you haven’t already gone to this site, I would strongly recommend you doing so.  If you watched the CNN video that Alan put in last weeks article, you were introduced to an amazing person, Holly Hershberg.   She tells how her husband lost his job in 2008.  This prompted them to start a garden.  From this, Holly came up with a plan to help families and communities could weather the tough times by growing produce themselves.  She doesn’t just talk the talk, like I do, but she walks the walk.

The first thing that she did was providing individuals with seeds for free! From their site under what they call the Dinner Menu you find Need Seeds? When you click on it you find a few locations where you can get free seeds.  If you don’t live near one of the sites you can find under these, ‘Don’t live in these places?’ Please note that due to incredibly high demand, we have a waiting list of over 45,000 families while we wait for additional funding for supplies. The wait may be over a year. If you would like to request seeds, please complete to our Seed Request Form. (The site also gives ways that donors can help provide more seeds)

Secondly, gardening information and tips are provided for cheap gardening in the space that is available.  She said that it is also about giving people hope and showing them another way to live.

Other information that can be found under Dinner Menu is such things as:

1. Projects: Seeds for School Kids, Feed a Family & Time Dollar

2. Gardening Info: Summer Produce, Fall Produce, Special Plants, Seed          Saving & Planting Guide.
3. Recipes: Beverage, Appetizer, Soup, Salad & Side Dish
4. 4.  Kids: has ‘Garden Stuff for Kids’

Their motto is: “The solution to hunger is in your backyard!” I would add: ‘in your front yard, flowerbeds and containers’, especially if you have limited in space for a garden.

I used to put some of my vegetable plants among my flowers in my front yard.  I am not sure why I stopped doing this.  Last year I planted some in my containers just to have a place to put the extra seedlings that I had started.  I didn’t have formal plan for this.  This year I will.

This is where the early planning comes into play.  Brainstorm about where you can grow produce in various places not normally considered.  Once you have come up with a plan, start looking for seeds to purchase now.

One of the first plants that I would consider is the ornamental pepper. An ornamental pepper is a pepper plant that is grown for its aesthetics.  Many peppers are quite compact and attractive, making them very suitable for flowerbeds and containers.  These peppers are edible and can be added to other foods or used in cooking.  They range from very mild to very hot.  One of the hot varieties that I have grown is the black pearl.   Some of them are so multicolored that they look like the old style Christmas lights and are often sold during the holiday season as Christmas peppers.  I am considering planting the Prairie Fire, or Christmas pepper, in my containers that sit on either side of my front door.  They are sold as plants or can be grown from seed.

Like other pepper plants ornamental peppers are very frost-sensitive. They can be grown indoors if they get some sun and are kept moist, but not waterlogged. Pinching back the new growth will allow you to shape the plant and encourage it to branch out and become bushier.

There are a variety of both regular sweet bell, mild and hot peppers that are colorful enough to grow among the flowers.  Some seed companies sell them in mixed packets so you won’t have to buy several separate seed packets to get all of these varieties.

I have previously talked about and planted the nasturtium flower.  Both the leaves and the flowers are edible.   I have used them in garden salads, but there are recipes for using them in other ways that can be found on the Internet.

The ornamental kale (cabbage) is also edible and works well in containers.  Varieties of lettuce can be planted among flowers and all sorts of herbs can be planted alone or with flowers.  All of the ones shown in the photos were done at the Thanksgiving Point Gardens where I take my Advanced Master Gardener course and do volunteer service.

Strawberry pots are not only for strawberries.  I also did an herb garden in one. Traditional squash plants and tomatoes will also work well in containers as demonstrate in this photo.   More innovative ways to grow produce are shown in this photo of produce grown in containers attached to a wall.

Plan on using some of produce grown to supplement your own diet and then give the additional produce to food pantries, soup kitchens or similar organizations. I plan on giving all of the produce grown among my flowers and most of that grown in my containers to these groups.  I also plan on planting an additional tomato plant from which I will donate the ripe fruit.

I also recommend that you and I start talking to neighbors and friends, that have fruit trees, to see if they would consider letting us harvest the fruit that they don’t use. In my neighborhood there is already a spot where excess garden produce can be donated and picked up by anyone.  I will see about taking any unused produce to organizations that can utilize the extra produce.  If either of the above works out I plan on expanding it to other neighborhoods.

Finally, if you have some spare time: talk to food pantries, food banks, etc. to see if you can help them stock shelves, clean the facilities or help in any other way.

While I was preparing this I was listening to Dr. Oz.  He had Jennifer Ashton, MD OB/GYN on his show and I loved her quote,

“Eat more from the farm and not from the factory”.

“She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.” Prov. 31: 20

Next week: What to do in winter for the next growing season

Dennis Adamson – Master Gardener
adamsond@juno.com Send any Questions to Dennis!
For The Family

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